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Wooden jokes 🌳🪓 in 2025

What was the tired tree looking for?
– He was looking fo-rest.

I caught a bunch of social justice warriors in my yard digging up large wooden stakes
– They said the posts had to be removed before they caused a fence

You want me to make that? Then I need to buy….”

When can a wooden piece be a king?
– When it becomes a ruler.

Why did Pinocchio prefer wooden girls over the real thing?
– Because the wooden girls are knotty!

Washington liked his wooden teeth enough.
– Unfortunately, they were all bark and no bite.

I like your work; it reminds me of when I was young and stupid.

How did the tree pull off such a great prank?
– He planted it well.

What did wood dress up as for Halloween?
– Bam-boo.

What are wooden dogs made of?
– Bark

If nail’en it won’t work, then screw it.

There are no mistakes in woodworking until you run out of wood.

What kind of tree can I fit in my hand?
– A palm tree.

What is the first thing the forest use in the morning?
– Toile-trees.

Did you hear about the man who had two wooden legs?
– His house caught fire. A neighbour called 911 and firemen responded. They saved the house but the man burned to the ground.

“Well you can get it done right-a-way or you can get it done right, your choice!”.

Where do baby woods go every morning?
– To the elemen-tree school.

I bought my wife a wooden leg for Christmas……..
– It wasn’t her main present, just a stocking filler.

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