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Welding jokes 👨‍🏭 in 2024

What do you call a welder without any friends?
– Voight.

What is the difference between a welder and a comedian?
– A comedian tells jokes.

What do you call a welding that breaks all the time?
– A crappy welder.

Did you hear about the two welders that got married?
– It was a beautiful welding.

What news does an underwater welder pay the most attention to?
– Current events.

What do you call a welder who never finishes his job?
– A welder.

What do you say to a guy with an I.Q. of 22?
– Nice weld.

Why did the apprentice start cutting thin air?
– He was told to start oxygen cutting.

Why do welders have beards?
– To hide their short-circuits.

Why do welder’s have red lines on their hands?
– From pressing up against hot metal all day.

Why did the underwater welder get fired?
– Because he didn’t work well under pressure.

What do you call a porcupine with an acetylene torch?
– Spiny the welder.

What do you call a welder with half a brain?
– Gifted.

How do you make a welding stop smoking?
– Put a piece of MIG wire in it!

What’s a welder’s favorite unit of length?
– Ammeter.

The welder who got PTSD…
– His flashback arrestor stopped working.

What did the welder say when he got fired from his job?
– “I’m sorry, I thought you said ‘finish’. ”

What do you say to a guy with an IQ of 10?
– Grind that weld.

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