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Watermelon jokes 🍉 in 2025

Why are watermelons so good at gossiping?
– They have all the juice!

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Best Worst Joke Ever: How do you get water into a watermelon?
– You plant it…in the spring!

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Did you hear about the fruit who was convicted of armed robbery?
– Now he’s a waterfelon.

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What do you call a sad watermelon?
– melancholy

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As i was walking down the road on a particularly hot day i noticed a rather large lady eating a watermelon in a dress with no underwear on…
– I had to inquire. You exposing yourself to keep cool ? She replied “Nah nah, but it sure does keep the flies off the watermelon.”

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Did you hear the joke about the watermelon?
– It’s pit-iful!

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Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?
– Because she wanted to be a watermelon!

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Where does the Roman stop eating his watermelon?
– At the Rhine.

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What do you call a girl with no arms, no legs, sitting in a watermelon patch?
– Melanie! (melon-y)

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Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?
– It wanted to become a watermelon.

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Why do watermelons take such a long time to make decisions?
– They’re always melon it over!

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What do you call a watermelon in California?
– A melon

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John has 20 watermelons and tim has none. John threw one watermelon at tim, what does tim have now?
– A concussion.

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Questions on the new quarantine math test
If johnny has 30 watermelons, and is forbidden to contact or interact with any other people for 21 days, how many watermelons is he left with?

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How do you get the water in a watermelon?
– Plant it in the spring.

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What do you get if you slice a watermelon into 4 pieces?
– A quarter-melon!

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Why did the watermelons ask for permission to get married?
– Because they cantaloupe.

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What did the father cantaloupe say to his son?
– Watermelon! (Water-my-lawn)

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