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Walmart jokes in 2025

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any high-end products? “We have a luxury section, it’s called Target.”

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any high-end makeup brands? “We have a high-end makeup section, it’s called the drugstore.”

Why did the Walmart employee wear a hard hat? To “protect” the customers from high prices.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always monitoring the security cameras? A “surveillance” associate.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always pushing carts? A “rolling” associate.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always on the move? A “mobility” associate.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a tent? To camp out in the parking lot for Black Friday deals.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a survival kit? To make it through the endless lines and crowds.

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any gourmet food? “We have a gourmet section, it’s called the deli.”

Why did the Walmart employee wear a superhero costume, cape, mask, and gloves? To fight the evil of high prices, protect customers from germs, and save the day.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a compass? To find the “hidden” clearance items.

Why did the Walmart employee wear a wizard hat? To cast a spell of low prices.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always checking receipts? A “loss prevention” associate.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always running around the store? A “runaway” associate.

Why did the chicken cross the road to Walmart? To get to the other aisle!

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a snorkel? To dive into the “deep” discounts.

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any designer sunglasses? “We have a designer sunglasses section, it’s called the gas station.”

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they carried organic food? “We have it, but you’ll have to dig for it.”

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