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Vegetable jokes 🥕🍅🥒 in 2025

I bought my girlfriend vegetables on valentine’s day
– She thinks i’m corny

why did the potatoes argue?
– because they couldnt see eye to eye.

What is a kayaker’s favourite kind of lettuce?
– Row-maine.

What was the cause of the veggie protest?
– An information leek.

What vegetable can work as a sports announcer?
– A common tater.

What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato whilst on a family walk?
– Ketchup.

Why did the carrot get embarrassed?
– Because it saw the chickpea.

What is a taxi driver’s favourite kind of vegetable?
– A cab-bage.

Did you know some vegetables are nevee transported by sea?
– Because having a leek in the boat would be very bad.

I started eating vegetables again.
– She couldn’t feel it but it was worth it.

Why did the tomato blush?
– Because he saw the salad dressing…Thank you Tom for this joke

What do you call a baby potato?
– A small fry.

Why did the corn stalk get angry with the farmer?
– He kept pulling her ears.

Whats the favorite vegetable of cannibals?
– Kid knee beans

We lost our dog at the grocery store while buying vegetables
– If you see him, lettuce know

Why did the tomato get embarassed?
– Cos it saw the chick pea!

How did the vegetables ask for a pay rise?
– Lettuce have a raisin celery.

What vegetable do you need when you get a flat tire?
– A-spare-I-guess.

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