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Vegetable jokes 🥕🍅🥒 in 2025

Why did the tomato blush?
– Because he saw the salad dressing…Thank you Tom for this joke

What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
– It all smells like carrots to me.

What is a cat’s favourite vegetable?
– As-purr-agus.

How does a vegetable pee?
– With its brussel spout

What vegetable strangles people at the gallery?
– An artichoke

What is small, red and whispers?
– A hoarse radish!

Why did the potato buy suntan lotion?
– So thought she may need it to stop her peeling on holiday.

What happens when you leave corn in the barn for too long?
– It gets cob-webs.

Why didn’t the vegetable pay its bills?
– Because it was a dead beet.

What is the hardest part about cooking vegetables?
– Getting the wheelchair in the oven.

What vegetable did Noah leave of the ark??
– The Leek

What did the daddy tomato say to the baby tomato when they were out walking?
– Ketchup.

My sister thought she was soo smart, she said the only vegetable/fruit that can make her cry is a onion
– So I threw a coconut at her

Why are tomatoes the slowest vegetable?
– Because they can’t ketchup.

When do you know a banana wants to dance?
– When you see a banana shake!

What did the carrot say when it was told that the swede had won the school writing competition?
– That’s a turnip for the books.

Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a cornfield?
– Because it’s full of ears.

What’s the best vegetable to have in the car?
– Asparagus

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