Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Vegetable jokes 🥕🍅🥒 in 2025

How did the farmer fix his jeans?
– With a vegetale patch.

What is a librarian’s favourite vegetable?
– Quiet peas.

I’ve started investing in stocks; beef, chicken and vegetable.
– One day I hope to be a bouillonaire.

Can someone help me with my vegetable soup?
– I can’t seem to fit the wheelchair into the pot.

Why did the carrot get embarrassed?
– Cos it saw the chick pea!…Thank you Evan, for this side-splitter.

Who is the smartest potato in the vegetable patch?
– I yam.

What kind of vegetable always gets jealous?
– A green bean.

I applied to be a vegetable farmer..
– They said they won’t pay me hourly they’ll pay me celery!

How ironic, a tornado tore through Miss Oklahoma’s vegetable patch the day after she was crowned Miss America.
– She actually got whirled peas.

Why did the tomato blush?
– Because it saw the salad dressing!

How do you fix a broken tomato?
– With tomato paste.

What did the organic vegetables die of?
– Natural causes.

My friend has a vegetable-themed bakery
– What a spud-muffin

Which vegetable knows kung fu?
– Brock Lee

What’s the fastest vegetable?
– A runner bean

Which martial art are vegetables good at?
– Carrotee.

What’s a gym instructor’s favourite kind of vegetable?
– Spin-ach!

I can’t find my vegetables.
– Hopefully, they turnip soon.

Follow us on Facebook