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Vegan Jokes 🥗 in 2025

So I put my dog on a vegan diet
-Don’t worry, I only feed him the finest vegans I can find

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What’s the hardest thing about being a vegan that CrossFits?
-Trying to decide which one to tell people about first.

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A vegan activist walks into a bar.
-I only knew he was a vegan activist because he told everyone within two minutes.

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How do you know if someone is Vegan?
-Don’t worry. They’ll tell you.

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What is a vegan Viking called?
-A Norvegan

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How many vegetarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
-I don’t know, but where do you get your protein?

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Why are most ghosts vegans?
-Because it is super natural

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I have read the vegan party’s party-program
– . and I am sorry to say that there is not much meat on it

Ba dam tsssh

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Knock! Knock!
Who’s there?
Frank.
-Frank who?
Frankly, you could use more fruits and veggies.

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What is the No. 1 health risk for vegans?
-Telling other people they are vegans

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I only eat vegan meat.
-I’ve got two in my freezer right now.

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My mouth waters when I smell a steak being grilled
-Does a vegan’s mouth water when the lawn is being cut?

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Did you know Bruce Lee has a vegan brother?
– Broco Lee

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Vegans don’t live longer
– It just feels like they do

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How many vegans does it take to change a lightbulb?
-None, everybody knows they can’t change anything.

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You know why vegans are the nicest people…?
-Because they got no beef

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Why did the ghost decide to become a vegan?
– Because it’s super natural.

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What do yo call a vegan post-punk band?
-Soy Division.

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