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Vegan Jokes 🥗 in 2025

A vegan told me people who sold meat were disgusting.
– I said people who sell fruit and veg are grocer.

Why did the vegan get fired ?
-His job performance did not meat expectations.

How many meat-eaters does it take to change a lightbulb?
– None, they would rather stay in the dark about things.

What’s the difference between being vegan and having Covid 19?
-With Covid the loss of taste is only temporary…

A kid get in trouble and as punishment is made to wear an “I am a Vegan!” t-shirt for the day. It is a horrible experience and they get called all sorts of names and things are thrown at them and they are even kicked a few times..
-All that before they even left the house!

I could never go vegan!
– Said almost every person (before going vegan)

So I put my dog on a vegan diet
-Don’t worry, I only feed him the finest vegans I can find

What’s the hardest thing about being a vegan that CrossFits?
-Trying to decide which one to tell people about first.

A vegan activist walks into a bar.
-I only knew he was a vegan activist because he told everyone within two minutes.

How do you know if someone is Vegan?
-Don’t worry. They’ll tell you.

What is a vegan Viking called?
-A Norvegan

How many vegetarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
-I don’t know, but where do you get your protein?

Why are most ghosts vegans?
-Because it is super natural

I have read the vegan party’s party-program
– . and I am sorry to say that there is not much meat on it

Ba dam tsssh

Knock! Knock!
Who’s there?
Frank.
-Frank who?
Frankly, you could use more fruits and veggies.

What is the No. 1 health risk for vegans?
-Telling other people they are vegans

I only eat vegan meat.
-I’ve got two in my freezer right now.

My mouth waters when I smell a steak being grilled
-Does a vegan’s mouth water when the lawn is being cut?

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