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Vaccine jokes 💉😷 in 2025

They said you had to wear a mask at the grocery store. They should have mentioned clothes, too.

I think the vaccine is making me magnetic!
– When I put a piece of tape on my skin it stuck to me!

What did the single guy say to the single woman during lockdown?
– “If COVID doesn’t take you out, can I?”

What does eating raw garlic have to do with preventing COVID-19?
– It helps keep everyone at a safe distance.

Two lab rats are talking… One says “Are you going to get that vaccine?”
– The other says “Are you crazy? They haven’t even finished the human trials yet!”

A vaccine has been released for the Indian coronavirus variant
– It’s called the Punjab

Being quarantined with a talkative child is like having an insane parrot glued to your shoulder.

You know who buys up all the toilet paper?
– Assholes.

What did the virologist say to the public?
– Probably the opposite of what he’ll tell them next week.

The Taliban has promised they WILL require a Covid Vaccine Pass
– from all individuals who are seeking to attend public executions.

A new vaccine has been developed to prevent fox from contracting rabies. Not many are getting the shot though. Only one…
Fox in eight

How did the health experts lie? They said a mask and gloves was enough to go to the grocery store. When I got there, everyone else had clothes on.

If there’s a baby boom nine months from now, what will happen in 2033?
– There will be a whole bunch of quaranteens.

What do you call grabbing your packages from the front porch?
– The day’s outdoor activities.

I tried to tell a covid vaccine joke to some anti-vaxxers…
– But they didn’t get it.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
– Because the chicken behind it didn’t know how to socially distance properly.

What do you call staging a beer in every room of the house?
– A pub crawl.

Knock-Knock!
Who’s there?
Etch
Ech Who?
Bless You!

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