Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Tomato jokes 🍅 in 2025

What is the tomato’s greatest desire?
– A jerrymato.

What is red and goes up and down?
– A tomato in an elevator.

Why is the tomato red?
– Because it’s angry that it can’t ride a bicycle

Why did the people in the race wait for the tomato? (first joke I ever made as a kid)
– So it could catch up.

What did the tomato say to the potato?
– “I’ll ketchup with you later.”

Someone has been adding soil to my garden.
– The plot thickens.

A man tried to start a fight by throwing dough, shredded cheese, and tomato sauce at me.
– So I said, “You wanna pizza me?”

A tomato walks into a bar and asks for a drink…
The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”

There are a Mommy tomato, a Daddy tomato and a little baby tomato. They are all going on a walk. The baby tomato is very slow and is falling behind, so what do the Mommy and Daddy tomato say?
– Catch up!

What looks like a half tomato?
– The other half.

How life is like ketchup?
– Like ketchup, good things in life come slow and are worth waiting for.

Three guys just met and they have a conversation about different sorts of paste
The first guy says: “I know everything about tomato paste, because I own an Italian restaurant.”

The second guy says: “I know everything about toothpaste, because I am a dentist.”

The third guy says: “I know everything about copy-paste, because I visit /r/jokes.”

Put some lettuce, sliced tomatoes, cucumber in front of a chicken, what does it see?
– The chicken sees a salad!

What does potatoes and tomatoes have in common?
– Toes

Is there anything Bacon said to Tomato?
– Lettuce get together!

Why did Mrs. Tomato turn red?
– She saw Mr. Green Pea over the back fence.

A tomato and a cucumber bounce into a bar.
“Larry and I have been wanting to become human for a while now,” the tomato says to the bartender. “But none of the other bars in town have drinks that will turn us into humans. Do you have such a drink?”

“I think I do,” says the bartender. “Let me see if I have it.”

“This is gonna be great, Bob!” gushes Larry the cucumber.

The bartender serves drinks to the two of them, and sure enough, they both turn human!

“Look at me, Bob!” exclaims Larry the ex-cucumber. “I’m human!”

“That’s very nice, Larry,” says Bob the ex-tomato, “but do be careful!”

Larry happily prances out the door. He is so excited about being human, he forgets to look both ways before crossing the street, and he is hit by a car and turned back into a cucumber.

Bob rushes outside to save his friend, but he too forgets to look both ways, is hit by a car, and turns back into a tomato.

The bartender rushes outside and calls an ambulance.

“Are they still alive?” asks the dispatcher.

“They are,” says the bartender, “but I’m worried that they will be vegetables for the rest of there lives.”

A Daddy tomato and a Baby tomato were walking down the street…
…when all of a sudden, Baby tomato started to fall behind, so Daddy tomato turned to Baby tomato and said “Ketchup!”

(I’m really sorry)

Follow us on Facebook