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Toe jokes 👣 in 2025

Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet?
– Because she didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills.

If you took all the people in the world who fall asleep during church, and laid them head to toe in a straight line
– They’d all be a lot more comfortable.

The easiest way to look at your toe is to look at a photoe.

Whom did the man call instead of a doctor after hurting his feet while driving?
– He called the toe truck.

What is the name of the book based on a place named after Jamaican toes?
– It is called ‘The Count of Mon-Toe Cristo’!

Put your foot in it eh?
– I came home from work to a note from the wife saying;
– “I’ve left you because you are stupid and bigoted”.
– I’m not stupid, I’m dyslexic and its not my fault I’ve got big toes!

What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
– Slow Natives.

Why do you think cows have hooves instead of feet?
– Because they lack toes.

When the man went to the hospital for a hangnail, the doctor looked at the assistant and said, “Medication won’t help, just call a toe truck. Immediately”.

What has five toes but isn’t your foot?
– My foot.

When I play Tic-tac-toe, I am fine with my opponent getting two squares in a row
– But three is where I draw the line.

The best way to keep yourself alert at all times is to join ballet because it is the only sport that keeps you on your toes throughout.

Why did the woman leave her ex-army husband with a broken toe after the war?
– Because the woman was lack toes intolerant.

What footwear do astronauts get home during Christmas?
– Missile toe.

It usually makes me happy when I go first in a game…
…Except in tic tac toe.
– Then it makes me cross.

Three cowboys are riding in a truck all dressed head to toe identically who is the smartest?
– The one in the middle because he doesn’t have to drive and doesn’t have to open the gate.

What is the kind of toe that is bad for someone’s health?
– It is a toe-baco!

A dinosaur with a sore toe and foot, should be called an Anklyo-sore-us.

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