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Teacher jokes 📚 in 2025

I just read a book about Helium.
– It was so good, I couldn’t put it down.

Decimals have a point,
-you know.

Where was the Magna Carta signed?
-At the bottom.

What did the zero say to the eight?
– “Nice belt!”

Three transitive verbs walk into a bar.
– They sit. They drink. They leave.

Time is a great teacher.
-Unfortunately, it kills all its students.

Why do teenagers always go out in groups of threes or fives?
– Because they “can’t even.”

hy are the early days of history called the Dark Ages?
– Because there were so many knights.

Why did the teacher go to the beach?
-To test the water!

Why do people make bad chemistry jokes?
-Because all the good ones Argon.

Why is the corner of the room always the hottest?
– It’s 90 degrees.

I think I’m going to quit.
-Teaching history is old news.

You know what seems odd to me?
-Numbers that can’t be divided by two.

Two elves walk into a bar.
-The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

Why was the broom late for school?
-He overswept.

Two guys walk into a bar. The first says he’ll have some H2O.
– The second says he’ll have some H2O2. He died.

What do you call friends who love math?
-Algebros.

Why did the pioneers cross America in covered wagons?
– They didn’t want to wait 40 years for a train!

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