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Stupid jokes in 2025

Where did the computer go dancing?
-The disc-o!

I like to spend every day as if it’s my last.
-Staying in bed and calling for a nurse to bring me more pudding.

Have you heard of the band 923 Megabytes?
-Probably not, they haven’t had a gig yet.

What sound does a nut make when it sneezes?
-Cashew!

What do you call a dangerous sun shower?
-A rain of terror!

What did the buffalo say when his son left?
-Bison!

Ever tried to eat a clock?
-It’s time-consuming.

What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?
– It gets toad!

What did one dish say to the other?
– Dinner is on me!

Where did the king keep his armies?
-Up his sleevies.

What do bees do if they need a ride?
– Wait at the buzz stop!

Why do cow-milking stools only have three legs?
– ‘Cause the cow’s got the udder!

What do you call a psychic little person who has escaped from prison?
-A small medium at large.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
-Because if they flew over the bay, they’ve bagels!

I was sitting in traffic the other day.
-Probably why I got run over.

Who can jump higher than a house?
– Pretty much anyone. (Houses can’t jump.)

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
-I don’t know, but its flag is a big plus!

What does a house wear?
-Address!

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