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Sports Jokes ⚽🥊⛷️ in 2025

What do you call a Cleveland Browns QB at the Super Bowl?
– A spectator.

What do you give a hockey player when he demands to be paid?
– A check.

Why was the basketball court wet?
– Because people were dribbling on it!

What ship holds 20 football teams but only three leave it each season?
– The Premier-ship!

Why can’t basketball players go on vacation?
– They aren’t allowed to travel.

How do you spot a Tennessee fan at a wedding?
– Look for the guy in the orange t-shirt.

Why don’t grasshoppers watch soccer?
– They watch cricket, instead.

Why was the footballer upset on their birthday?
– They got a red card!

Why did the footballer hold their boot to their ear?
– Because they liked sole music!

Why did the Braves hire a baker?
– They needed a new batter.

What do you call twelve millionaires gathered around the TV to watch the NBA Finals?
– The Detroit Pistons.

How did America steal the name for football?
– They grabbed it and ran.

Why did the soccer player bring string to the game?
– He wanted to tie things up.

Why did the manager bring pencils and sketchbooks into the dressing room before the game?
– He was hoping for a draw!

What do you call a [insert team here] player in the knockout stages of the World Cup?
– A referee!

Why are some umpires chubby?
– It’s their job to clean their plates.

What’s a golfer’s favorite letter?
– Tee!

Hockey players are like goldfish.
– Just tap on the glass to get their attention.

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