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Sports Jokes ⚽🥊⛷️ in 2025

Which team always start the match with a bang?
– The Gunners!

What’s the difference between a pickpocket and an umpire?
– One steals watches and one watches steals.

Why was Cinderella kicked off the basketball team?
– She ran away from the ball.

What does a hockey play and a magician have in common?
– They both do hat tricks.

Why can’t you play soccer in the jungle?
– There are too many cheetahs!

Who scored the most goals in the Greek Mythology League?
– The centaur forward!

Where do you keep your mitt while driving?
– In the glove compartment.

How many Chicago Bears does it take to win a Super Bowl?
– One. Walter Payton. But he’s retired.

Why are hockey players so good at making friends?
– They’re quick to break the ice.

Why did the basketball player go to jail?
– Because he shot the ball.

What part of a football pitch smells nicest?
– The scenter spot!

Which football player wears the biggest helmet?
– The one with the biggest head.

What happens when a dinosaur gets a goal?
– A dino-score.

Which football team loves ice-cream?
– Aston Vanilla!

What runs along the edge of the pitch but never moves?
– The sideline!

When should baseball players where armor?
– When they’re playing knight games.

I’m thinking of creating a fantasy show about basketball.
– I’ll call it Hoopernatural.

Why did the boy climb up the tree with a hockey stick
– Cause he wanted to join the maple leafs.

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