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Sports Jokes ⚽🥊⛷️ in 2025

What do soccer referees send during the holidays?
– Yellow cards.

What is a goalkeeper’s favourite snack?
– Beans on post!

Why did the footballer take a piece of rope onto the pitch?
– They were the skipper!

Did you hear the joke about the pop fly?
– Forget it. It’s way over your head.

Why are frogs so good at basketball?
– They always make the jump shots.

Where does a majority of a hockey player’s salary come from?
– The tooth fairy.

Why did people in the NBA think Michael Jordan was conceited?
– Because he was always putting on Airs.

During the World Cup in Brazil, the England team visited an orphanage. “It was heart-breaking to see their sad little faces with no hope,” said João, age 6.

How do baseball players keep in touch?
– They touch base every once in a while.

Why couldn’t the all-star football player listen to any music?
– He broke all the records.

Why couldn’t anyone see the soccer ball?
– The defense cleared it.

What is black and white and black and white and black and white?
– A Newcastle fan rolling down a hill!

Why are footballers like babies?
– They both dribble!

Where do they keep the largest diamond in New York City?
– Yankee Stadium.

Why was the basketball player sitting on the sidelines drawing chickens?
– Coach told her to learn how to draw fouls.

A man takes his five-year-old son to his first football game.
– They had great seats right behind their team’s bench.

What lights up a soccer stadium?
– A soccer match.

Why don’t grasshoppers watch football?
– They prefer cricket!

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