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Sports Jokes ⚽🥊⛷️ in 2025

What part of a football pitch smells nicest?
– The scenter spot!

Which football player wears the biggest helmet?
– The one with the biggest head.

What happens when a dinosaur gets a goal?
– A dino-score.

Which football team loves ice-cream?
– Aston Vanilla!

What runs along the edge of the pitch but never moves?
– The sideline!

When should baseball players where armor?
– When they’re playing knight games.

I’m thinking of creating a fantasy show about basketball.
– I’ll call it Hoopernatural.

Why did the boy climb up the tree with a hockey stick
– Cause he wanted to join the maple leafs.

Why is bad soccer like an old bra?
– Neither provide padding or support.

What did the manager do when the pitch became flooded?
– He sent on his subs!

Which baseball player holds water?
– The pitcher.

What do football players wear for Halloween?
– Face masks.

What’s the difference between hockey and wrestling?
– In hockey, the fights are real.

What would you call the world’s greatest hockey player if he’d decided not to play hockey?
– Wayne Regretsky.

Why did the poor QB have his receivers cross at mid-field?
– He was trying to make ends meet.

What do you call an Englishman in the knockout stages of the World Cup?
– A referee.

Where’s the best place in America to shop for a football kit?
– New Jersey!

Why are hockey rinks rounded?
– Because if they were 90 degrees, the ice would melt.

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