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Sports Jokes ⚽🥊⛷️ in 2025

Why did the football quit the team?
– It was tired of being kicked around!

What do you call the basketball play where you drink too much and then score?
– Slam Drunk.

Which fast-food chain is most likely to win a basketball tournament?
– Dunkin’ Donuts.

Where do catchers sit at lunch?
– Behind the plate.

Why did Cinderella get kicked off the football team?
– Because she kept running away from the ball!

Which team is the chewiest?
– The Toffees!

What do you call a monkey who wins back-to-back titles?
– The Chimpion.

If a basketball player gets athlete’s foot, what’s an astronaut get?
– Missile Toe!

Why couldn’t the defensive end pass any of his tests?
– He was a tackling dummy.

Why are soccer players excellent at math?
– They know how to use their heads.

How did the football pitch end up as triangle?
– Somebody took a corner!

Did you hear? Detroit is building a new stadium at an undisclosed location.
– They’re keeping it a secret because they’re afraid the Tigers might find out and try to play there.

What’s the difference between Kobe Bryant and time?
– Time actually passes.

Hockey players are known for their summer teeth.
– Summer here, summer there.

Did you hear about the referee that got fired from the NBA?
– Supposedly he’s a whistleblower.

Why do football players do well in school?
– They know how to use their heads!

I love the fall. It gives me a chance to sit at home and watch the World Series.
– Just like the Dodgers.

Who played in the pirate Super Bowl?
– The Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Seattle Seahawks.

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