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Snake jokes 🐍 in 2024

I got mugged by a cobra once when I was walking through the park.
– I wouldn’t recognize it again, though. It was wearing a hood.

A drum set and a snake falls off a cliff.
– The drummer and pet shop owner are very sad now.

How do venomous snakes kill their prey?
– In cold blood.

What do you call a snake that builds things?
– A boa constructor

What type of snake does a baby like to play with?
– A rattlesnake.

A snake walks into a bar.
– The bartender says “How the hell did you do that?”

I used to be jealous of Harry Potter for being able to talk to snakes.
– But it turns out, I’ve been doing it for years.

What did the snake give to his wife?
– A goodnight hiss.

why doesnt voldemort have a human nose?
– because his snake bit it of

What kind of snake is best at Rap?
– The Spittin’ Cobra

One snake says to the other snake, are we poisonous? The other replies, I don’t know why do you ask?
– The first snake replies, because I just bit my lip!

What kind of letters did the snake get from his admirers?
– Fang letters.

What do married snakes have on their bath towels?
– “Hiss,” and “Herss.”

What kind of letters did the snake get from his admirers?
– Fang letters.

What did St. Patrick say when he drove all the snakes out of Ireland?
– “You all ok in the back there?”

What do you get if you cross two snakes with a magic spell?
– Addercadabra and abradacobra.

Did you hear about the snake who wrote a love letter to his girlfriend?
– He sealed it with a hiss.

Why can’t you play jokes on snakes?
– Because you can never pull their legs.

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