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Snake jokes 🐍 in 2025

Why can’t a snake rob a bank?
– Because they are unarmed.

Why do snakes always measure in inches?
– Because they don’t have any feet

What is a snake’s favorite school subject?
– Hisstory.

What is a snake’s favorite school subject?
– Hisstory.
I came up with that in a dream last night, hope it’s OC.

What did the Mommy snake say to the Baby snake?
– “Please stop crying and viper your nose.”

Why are snakes hard to fool?
– They have no legs to pull.

A snake walks into a bar.
– The bartender says, “How did you do that?”

What is a snake’s favorite dance?
– The Mamba.

What do you call an important English snake?
– Sir Pent.

A goat, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff…
– Baa dum ssss

An imaginative young snake’s family threw it out of the nest.
– They had no time for its newfangled ideas

A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff…
– Baa dum tssssss.

How does a snake shoot something?
– With a boa and arrow.

What do you call a snake that’s 3.14 meters long?
– A “Pi”-thon.

Why snakes can’t rob a bank?
– Because they are unarmed

What do you call a Mexican snake?
– Hisssspanic.

What medication does a snake with hay fever take?
– An antihissstamine.

My gf is a snake…
– Whenever you ask her whose fault was it, she goes “HISSSSSSSSSS”

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