Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Sloth jokes 🦥 in 2025

Why did the sloths vote to keep the coal mines open?
– Because when it comes to energy, they’re conservative.

A sloth got robbed by two turtles…
– A sloth got robbed by two turtles. When the police questioned him about it he said, I don’t know. It all happened so fast.

Why didn’t the sloth go extinct?
– They didn’t plan on going anywhere.

What is the three-toed sloth’s favorite snack chip?
– Fritos.

What do you get if you crossbreed a banana slug with a sloth?
– a nobel prize in medicine
– dad

As winter approaches – bringing cold weather and family drama – we crave page-turners, books made for long nights and tryptophan-induced sloth.

Thought I was watching a video of a sloth for 10 minutes yesterday. Turned out, it was just a picture!

Why’d the sloth cross the road?
– No one knows, because he hasn’t made it yet!

They say I have a body built for sin…
– That sin being sloth.

What do you get when you cross a sloth and a Scottish rock band?
– Slow Patrol

What do sloths throw in winter?
– Slowballs.

What do you call a sloth with a big heart?
– A sloft-ee.

What did the grape say when the sloth stood on it?
– Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

You got gonorrhea from a sloth…?
– *slow clap*

What’s the favourite song of sloths?
– Don’t Hurry, Be Happy

So a sloth gets mugged by three turtles
– When the police arrived and asked him what happened he said “Immm nnnot ssuurree, Iiiit happpeennnd soooooo faasssttt”

I’m an all-or-nothing guy. When I’m working, I work, work, work, work, work, and when I’m not, I’m the laziest sloth this planet has ever provided us.

Watched a sloth eat a watch the other day. It was very time consuming…

Follow us on Facebook