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Sloth jokes 🦥 in 2025

What did the turtle say while dating the sloth?
– Let’s take it sloooowwwww.

What do you call a sloth who barely moves?
– A slow-off!

What do sloths throw when winter hits?
– Slowballs.

Sloth motto : Nope. No Way. Not Going To Happen. Not Today!!!

What is a sloths favorite icy treat?
– Slow-cone. (Snow cone)

I Saw A Sloth Eating A Watch…
– It Was Very Time Consuming!

What’s the difference between a lazy overeater and a flirtatious emo?
– One is Sloth the Gluttonous the other is Goth the Sluttiness.
– Yep made that up on the way home today… Sorry.

My background is degradation and sloth, mostly.

Why are sloths the most social animals?
– Because they always wanna hang out!

Why did the sloths vote to keep the coal mines open?
– Because when it comes to energy, they’re conservative.

A sloth got robbed by two turtles…
– A sloth got robbed by two turtles. When the police questioned him about it he said, I don’t know. It all happened so fast.

Why didn’t the sloth go extinct?
– They didn’t plan on going anywhere.

What is the three-toed sloth’s favorite snack chip?
– Fritos.

What do you get if you crossbreed a banana slug with a sloth?
– a nobel prize in medicine
– dad

As winter approaches – bringing cold weather and family drama – we crave page-turners, books made for long nights and tryptophan-induced sloth.

Thought I was watching a video of a sloth for 10 minutes yesterday. Turned out, it was just a picture!

Why’d the sloth cross the road?
– No one knows, because he hasn’t made it yet!

They say I have a body built for sin…
– That sin being sloth.

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