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Silly jokes in 2025

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
-Because he had no body to go with.

Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
-It was in tents!

Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?
– There was nothing left but de Brie.

What concert only costs 45 cents?
-50 Cent featuring Nickleback.

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
-I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus.

Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they’re gonna pay.
-You have my Word.

How many tickles does it take to get an octopus to laugh?
-Ten tickles

I tried to win a suntanning competition.
-But all I got was bronze.

What do you call a musician with problems?
-A trebled man.

What goes up and down but does not move?
-Stairs

Where should you go in the room if you’re feeling cold?
-The corner—they’re usually 90 degrees.

What kind of shoes does a spy wear?
-Sneakers.

Why are toilets always so good at poker?
-They always get a flush

I stayed up all night and tried to figure out where the sun was.
-Then it dawned on me.

Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends?
-Well, honestly, he’s a real pain in the neck.

How much space will be freed in the EU after Brexit?
-Approximately 1 GB.

Where do snowmen keep their savings?
-In the snowbank.

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
-One is really heavy and the other’s a little lighter.

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