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Silly jokes in 2025

What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
-Attire.

And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.”
-But John came fifth and won a toaster.

You heard the rumor going around about butter?
-Never mind, I shouldn’t spread it.

I couldn’t believe the highway department called my dad a thief.
-But when I got home, the signs were all there.

Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
-Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan.

Why were they called the “dark ages?”
-Because there were a lot of knights.

What do you call malware on a Kindle?
-A bookworm.

What do you call a religious person who sleepwalks?
-A roamin’ Catholic.

Why should you never trust stairs?
-They’re always up to something.

What did the Buddhist ask the hot dog vendor?
-“Make me one with everything.”

What do you call a fake noodle?
-An impasta.

Two windmills are standing on a wind farm. One asks, ‘What’s your favorite kind of music?’
-The other replies, ‘I’m a big metal fan.’

Why did the cowboy get a wiener dog?
-He wanted to get a long little doggie.

A sandwich walks into a bar.
– The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”

What gets wetter the more it dries?
-A towel.

Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized?
-The doctors say it was due to too many strokes.

Did you hear about the carrot detective?
-He always got to the root of every case.

When does a joke become a ‘dad’ joke?
-When it becomes apparent.

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