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Sandwich jokes 🥪 in 2025

You’re probably Ghana think”no one will Bolivia. There’s just Norway.”
– I thought I Kuwait but then I Saudi Turkey, Iraq of ribs and a Canada best sauce and my Bahrain was like Oman, I Israel Hungary… so Iran to the kitchen to put Greece in the pan.

I hoped it could get Finnish quickly and because I was Russian, I didn’t Czech the label and accidentally added Chile. When I went to the loo I badly burnt my Holland I passed out.

I ended up in a hospital in Taiwan. I received Taipei blood and discharged. I had nowhere Togo and it was the worst situation I’ve ever Benin. I thought my wife would be worried or Rwanda where I’ve been.

I needed food and thought Alaska. I phoned her and asked “Kenya bring me a sandwich?” she brought me pineapple on a bun because she knows it’s just Hawaii roll.

The end.

The best way to stop a sandwich curling is to hide its brushes.

Wife and husband are in the living room.
She’s doing stuff in her computer, while he’s sitting on the couch typing on his phone.
At one point, wife’s cellphone receives a message.
Her phone is charging in the kitchen, so she stands up from her desk and goes to the kitchen.
At the kitchen, she looks up her phone and see’s a text message from her husband.
“Well, since you’re in the kitchen, might as well make me a sandwich.”

What’s a whale’s favorite sandwich?
– A krill-cheese sandwich

(This is a popular joke where I’m from). A boy boards a bus with a sandwich in his hand.
The bus driver says: ” hey, this ain’t a restaurant, kid!”
The boy replies: “I know. That’s why I brought my own food.”

KID: “Dad, make me a sandwich!”
DAD: “Poof, you’re a sandwich!”

Priest and Rabbi
– A priest and a rabbi were having lunch and the priest asked, “Have you ever strayed from not eating pork?” The rabbi said, “Well, once, but there was absolutely nothing else to eat, so I had a ham sandwich.”
Then the rabbi asked the priest, “Did you ever stray from your vow of celibacy?” The priest said, “Yes, just once.”
And the rabbi said, “Sure beats a ham sandwich, doesn’t it?”

I went to subway with my wife and asked the girl to make me a sandwich.
She said “no problem”
I turned to my wife and said “now, how hard was that?”

What does an injured person and the fillings of a sandwich have in common
– They’re both in pain

What do you call a horse meat sandwich in Kentucky?
– Last placed.

Why do hamburgers go to the gym?
– To get better buns.

TIFU By Eating My Boss’s Sandwich
– Oops wrong sub.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer.
– The bar man says, “sorry, we don’t serve food”.

The Cheeseburger
Man walks into a bar and the sign reads:
Cheeseburger – $1.50
Chicken Sandwich – $2.00
Hand Jobs – $10.00
He calls over the waitress and asks: “Are you the one who gives the handjobs?”
She smiles and answers: “Yes I am!”
So the man replies: “Can you please wash you hands, I want a cheeseburger.”

Man 1: “I love sandwiches!” Man 2: “Me too. By the way, I heard you just bought a horse! What did you name it?” Man 1: “Mayo.” Man 2: “Mayo? Why Mayo?”
Man 1: “Because he neighs.”

Friends told me to bring bangers and rockets to their fireworks party. My sausage and peppery lettuce sandwiches didn’t go down well.

What did the caveman order at the cafeteria?
– A Club Sandwich

Why did the chemist die after making himself a Pb & Jelly sandwich?
– He got lead poisoning.

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