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Sandwich jokes 🥪 in 2025

Why do Zombies go to Subway?
– Because they like to Eat Flesh.

90% of dogs in Korea are inbred…
– I’m assuming that means like in a sandwich or something.

So a sandwich walks into a bar
– He sits down and asks the bartender for a beer, the bartender says Sorry we don’t serve food here .

What did the Sentient Sandwich say to himself?
What did the Sentient Sandwich say to himself?
“Damn it! I should have said ” Make a sandwich for me”.

What do you call a Subway manager who spends too much time helping make sandwiches up front and not enough time back in the office attending to business matters?
– Counter productive.

If Trump and Hillary are both drowning and you could only save one…
– What type of sandwich would you make?

A cheese sandwich is better than complete happiness
– Because nothing is better than complete happiness, and a cheese sandwich is better than nothing.

Bach, the great composer, was having a difficult time writing new music.
With 20 kids in the house, it was hard for him to find quiet time to work.
So he decided to find a quiet place outdoors, and found a small shed in the woods. Unfortunately, it was so far from his home, that by the time he got there and started writing, it was time to go back home for lunch.
His wife came up with an idea, and started packing him sandwiches and snacks in a small bag to take with him. Brilliant!
And to this day, we can thank her for one of history’s greatest inventions, the Bach’s Lunch.

AITA for mixing up orders and serving a vegan customer a meat sandwich?
– Oops wrong sub

Saw a sign in a cafe that said they serve breakfast at any time. I asked for a bacon sandwich during the Industrial Revolution.

A man walks into a bar, and begins reading the menu overhead the smoking hot bartender.
The sign reads as follows:
* Nachos $4
* Hamburger $3
* Hotdog $2
* Grilled Chicken Sandwich $3
* Grilled Cheese $2
* Fries, Onion Rings, and Tater Tots $1.50
* Handjob $10
After he looks over the menu for a moment he asks the bartender, “Are you the one who gives the handjobs?” “Why yes I am.” replies the bartender seductively. Then says the man, “Wash your hands! I’d like a hamburger.”

A cheese sandwich walks into a pub.
– The landlord says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food”

Subway is opening a sandwich making college in Alabama.
– Everyone there is already great at making things inbred.

What did bacon say to tomato?
– Lettuce get together

A man walks into a bar…
and glances at the menu.
* **Sandwiches, $2**
* **Hand jobs, $5**
He calls over to the waitress, a gorgeous young blonde woman who appeared to be in her mid-twenties.
“Hey, hi there. Are you the one doing the hand jobs?”
She smiles thinly, “Yes sir, I am.”
“Well, wash your hands and put on some gloves. I’d like a sandwich.”

Why doesn’t Chick-fil-a have a double chicken sandwich?
– 2 chicks together isn’t really their thing.

McDonalds just released a new sandwich made entirely of beef lips.
– They’re calling it the McJagger.

What do my life and my sandwich have in common
– They both fall apart right in front of my eyes

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