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Running jokes 🏃‍♀️ in 2025

What do runners do as a brain workout?
– They jog their memory.

Why did the personal trainer get a new change of clothes?
– Because someone told him that he was ripped.

“Start slow, then taper off.”

What do you call a 13 year old girl from Kentucky who can run faster than her six brothers?
– A virgin.

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today,
– but those cops came out of nowhere

Why did the track runner not get out of bed?
– He was fast asleep.

What are the mediocre new jogging machines at the gym called?
– Run of the mill.

“Runner’s logic: I’m tired. Let me go for a run.”

Why do midgets laugh when they run?
– Because the grass tickles their balls.

Why did the podiatrist make his patients wait a long time before calling them?
– Because time is supposed to heel all wounds.

Why did the vegetarians stop doing cross country runs?
– Because they didn’t like meets.

“There are many challenges to long distance running,
– but one of the greatest is the question of where to put one’s house keys.”

“Running makes me feel less like I want to kill people.”

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to?
– The computer runs.

Why did the trainer make the runner workout in the sun?
– He wants him to feel the burn.

Why didn’t the personal trainer pay his rent?
– Because he was squatting.

“It is true that speed kills. In distance running,
– it kills anyone who does not have it.”

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted,
– but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

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