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Retirement jokes ๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿ‘ต in 2025

Somewhere an elderly lady reads a book on how to use the internet, while a young boy googles โ€œhow to read a bookโ€.

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Are you always this stupid or is today a special occasion?

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Whatโ€™s the difference between people and tin foil?
โ€“ Tin foil doesnโ€™t wrinkle as it oldens.

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Retirement is like one big sick day without the sick pay.

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Retirement is sweet any way you slice it!

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Trump wonโ€™t get re-elected if we just stop fixing our grandparentsโ€™ WiFi.

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โ€œI never had the sense that there was an end; that there was a retirement or that there was a jackpot.โ€

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Working with you was a real pleasure. Let your husband know he can use me as a reference if he has any doubts about that.

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The question isnโ€™t at what age I want to retire, itโ€™s at what income.

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How can you tell that youโ€™re getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!

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โ€œItโ€™s paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnโ€™t appeal to anyone.โ€

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Donโ€™t mess with old people, life imprisonment is not that much of a deterrent anymore.

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If Iโ€™ve learned one thing from some of the most successful people in life itโ€™s this, donโ€™t come out of retirement, if it didnโ€™t work for Brett Favre, it canโ€™t work for anyone.

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Be nice to your kids. Theyโ€™ll choose your nursing home.

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Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.

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To be old and wise, you must first be young and stupid.

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When did being unemployed become something to brag about?

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Your entire lifeโ€™s work โ€“ Worth nothing more than cake.

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