Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Retirement jokes ๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿ‘ต in 2025

Even in retirement you still have to share with the whole office.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.

I’m taking Viagra and drinking prune juice – I don’t know if I’m coming or going.

โ€œA retired husband is often a wifeโ€™s full-time job.โ€

Congratulations on deciding life is more important than work. What took you so long?

I’m not sure why you’d want to re-tire, we’re all tired already!

Another World’s Oldest Man has died. This is beginning to look suspicious.

Back in my day, we didn’t watch TV while we ate dinner. We actually talked to each other. It was awful.

โ€œSometimes itโ€™s hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or punishment.โ€

Be nice to your kids. Theyโ€™ll choose your nursing home.

I hear retirement is really lonely. I hope you don’t get lonely. If you do, don’t call me, I’ll be at work.

It must be so hard leaving us all knowing you’ll actually have to do things for yourself in retirement.

Grandma’s been staring through the window ever since it started to snow. If it gets any worse I’ll have to let her in.

I love coffee. It’s Redbull for old people.

You know youโ€™re getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party.

What do you call someone whoโ€™s happy on Mondays? Retired!

It’s sad you only get cake when you leave.

When is a retiree’s bedtime?
– Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

Follow us on Facebook