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Psychology jokes 🧠 in 2024
Psychology is one of the popular subjects at school. With students from various disciplines, it’s a subject many can relate to. As such, we have Psychologist Jokes to add fun to it. So, while you try to understand how the mind works, make it more interesting with hilarious psychology jokes.
Why was the moralist not allowed inside the bar?
– He didn’t have a valid Id.
My psychiatrist said….
– “Tell me, how long have you been having these hallucinations about seeing a psychiatrist?”
When I was younger my parents sent me to a child psychologist
– That kid didn’t help at all.
My psychologist says I have trouble identifying my emotions
– Not quite sure how I feel about it
What did the bouncer say to the psychology major and his friends, Ego and Superego?
– I’m sorry I can’t let you enter without Id.
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
– Just one, but it takes nine visits.
A client comes for his first therapy session. He has a small cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear, and a banana in his right ear.
– “Can you help me figure out what’s wrong with me?”
– he asks the therapist. The therapist replies, “You’re not eating properly.”
“Doctor,” said the receptionist over the phone, “there’s a patient here who thinks he’s invisible.”
– “Well, tell him I can’t see him right now.”
How many people with narcissism does it take to change to change a tire?
– You only need one. He’ll hold the tire and the world will revolve around him.
Why do horse psychology majors always end up performing better than the other animals?
– Their studying environment is a little more stable than the others’.
What did the client tell the psychologist when she questioned him about his co-dependency issues?
– If that’s what you think, I agree.
Secretary to Psychologist: “Doctor, there is a patient here who thinks he is invisible.”
– Psychologist: “Tell him I can’t see him right now.”
What do you get when you cross a banana peel with a psychologist ?
– A freudian slip.
What was Waldo going to start psychotherapy?
– He wanted to find himself.
Child walks past the parents bedroom,
– looks inside and mumbles: And you want to send me to a psychologist for thumb sucking.
Why did the psychologist not meet the client who thought he was invisible?
– He didn’t have the time to see him.
Why didn’t the psychology grad learn anything in college?
– He minored in reverse psychology.
Did you hear about that psychologist’s awesome speech last night?
– It was amazing! The crowd was really eating it up. Everyone was going absolutely sane.