Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Pregnancy jokes 🤰👶 in 2025

To pee or not to pee is never the question. Pee.

“Baby brain is real. I should not be allowed to operate heavy equipment, including iPhones.”

I’m pregnant. I asked my husband to place the Oreos where I couldn’t reach them.?
– He put them on the floor.

Since I became pregnant, my breasts, buttocks, and even my feet have grown. Does anything get smaller during pregnancy?
– Yes, your bladder.

What hurts even more than childbirth?
– Having to sing “Wheels on the Bus” 20,000 times a day.

“Are you the lady who doesn’t realize she’s pregnant until she’s sitting on the toilet and the kid pops out?”

“Love is all fun and games until someone loses an eye or gets pregnant.”

How many days in a month?
– Each month has an average of 30-31 days, except the last month of pregnancy, which has 742.

Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
– When the kids are in college.

Is there anything you should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
– Pregnancy.

“There’s a whole birthing plan, but what is the plan other than to get it out? I mean, there isn’t an option to kind of keep it in, is there? So I’m assuming my plan is to get it out. But apparently, there’s more to the plan than that. I don’t know what that is.

How do you know kidney stones are worse than pregnancy?
– After a kidney stone, nobody says, “let’s have another.”

What is the most common pregnancy craving?
– For men to be the ones who get pregnant

What’s the weirdest stage of pregnancy?
– When people aren’t sure whether to congratulate you or hand you some Gas-X.

Telling the world you’re pregnant is like telling the world you had unprotected sex.

“I had this thing for Entenmann’s chocolate donuts. Somewhere during my pregnancy, I gained something like nine pounds in two weeks and my doctor was like, ‘You know what it might be? Are you drinking a lot of juice?’ I was like, ‘Yeah. That must be it.’ I was eating like a box a day of Entenmann’s donuts.” — Tina Fey

Do I need to have a baby shower?
– Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly!

What’s the weirdest stage of pregnancy?
– When people aren’t sure whether to congratulate you or hand you some Gas-X.

Follow us on Facebook