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Planet jokes 🪐🌍🌑 in 2025

There was an astronaut who landed on an alien planet inhabited by several beautiful women.
– When he climbed out of his spaceship, he was approached by the women, who were all some 20 feet taller. One came up to him and asked, ‘I suppose you want to see the leader?’ The astronaut looked up at her, and replied:

“’Take me to your ladder. I’ll see your leader later.’”

I called Serena Williams. I said, “Serena, what’s your favorite planet?”
– She said, “It’s Venus.”

Me: I’m sorry Venus. Could you put Serena on the phone?

Jupiter heard from Neptune that Pluto was pregnant.
– Jupiter said to Pluto “Congratulations! I was surprised to hear that you’re expecting!”

To which Pluto replied “Thanks. Yeah, I definitely didn’t planet!”

There must be another planet somewhere with worms.
– Otherwise why would we call ours Earth worms

What did earth tell the other planets?
– Get a life!

What do you call an undiscovered planet?
– I don’t know… It doesn’t have a name yet.

You can be the most beautiful woman on the planet but if you can’t cook
– don’t worry I can

What is Hitlers least favourite planet
– Jewpiter

How do astronauts make sure their mission goes smoothly?
– They planet.

Why can’t Superman attend the Daily Planet meeting?
– Because Clark Can’t.

Scientists have discovered a planet populated entirely by robots.
– They call it Mars.

How do astronomers organize a party?
– **They planet.**

On October 31st, we will have a full moon, and the 7th planet from the sun will be its brightest…
– So when someone sees the moon that day, they will likely see Uranus too…

Why is Uranus so big?
– Because you discovered it

What do you call an orgy between planets?
– The Big Bang.

Steve jobs and Bill Gates colonize Mars. What do they call the planet?
– Planet of the Apps.

So aliens flew by our planet recently and one asked the other…
– Alien 1 How advanced is that civilization?

Alien 2 They have discovered nuclear technology.

Alien 1 Oh boy… That’s pretty intelligent. We better keep our distance then from their missles.

Alien 2 Nah, they’re not that smart yet. They have em pointed at themselves.

What do vegan black holes say?
– “I’m on a strictly planet based diet”

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