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Pirate jokes 🏴‍☠️ in 2025

What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?
-I, I, R, and the seven C’s!

What did the first mate send down the toilet?
-The Captain’s log!

Where do pirates go for a drink?
-. The sand bar!

What kind of grades did the pirate get in school?
– High Cs

Why do pirates bury their treasure 18 inches under the ground?
-Because booty is only shin deep!

Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank?
– Because they’ll just wash up on shore later.

Which Star Wars character do pirates like the most?
– Aarrrrggh-2-D2!

Why’d the pirate go to the Apple store?
-He needed a new ipatch

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
-A nervous wreck.

What happened when Bluebeard fell overboard in the Red Sea?
– He got marooned.

Why did the pirate cross the road?
– To get to the second-hand shop!

What did the pirate say when he became an octogenarian?
-Aye matey years old!

What is a pirate’s favorite letter?
– P. because it would be an R, but it’s missing a leg.

Where do pirates keep their valuables?
– In a jarrrrr

What do you call a stupid pirate?
– The pillage idiot!

Why did the pirate go to the Apple store?
-To buy an iPatch.

How do ye turn a pirate furious?
-Take away the “p.”

What’s a pirate’s favorite exercise?
The plank!

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