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Periodic table jokes 🧪⚗️🧑‍🔬☣ in 2025

Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium hooked up last night?
– OMg!

I was looking for sodium on the periodic table, but then it told me it was not available! (Na)

The neutron says “Are you sure?”
– The proton replies “I’m positive.”

Eminem is that guy in chemistry class that raps the whole periodic table.
– But skips Oxygen.

When everyone called Hydrogen a loner, Helium laughed out loud, “HeHeHe”.

What happened to the chemist in the cave?
– Berkelium (bear kill him)

Did you hear Oxygen and Potassium went on a date?
– Yeah, it went OK. (O is the symbol for oxygen, K is the symbol for potassium.)

What is the most important rule in chemistry?
– Never lick the spoon!

What element in the Periodic Table of Elements can you not take seriously?
– Silly-con!

To break a wild horse, get a proper lasso and then Europium.

What do you call dinosaurs that love the periodic table of elements?
– Nothing. They Argon.

What do you get when you mix helium with steel?
– Flying cars!

What element is a girl’s future best friend?
– Carbon. (diamond joke)

Sometimes when my girlfriend is on her period, I’ll push on her stomach
– And I’ll say: “who’s my little ketchup packet?”

I told a chemistry joke but there was no reaction.

What do you say when: oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorous walk into a bar?
– OH SNaP!

What sharp object do you get when you combine potassium, nickel, and iron?
– KNiFe.

My friend drew a giant periodic table and tripped on number 10
– He’s fine, but he could have hurt his Neon that

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