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Penguin Jokes 🐧 in 2025

Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
-(The outside!)

What was the name of the emperor’s penguin?
– Julius Freezerrr.

When I become a lawyer I want to defend a penguin.
– Just so I can say the words “Your Honor, clearly my client is not a flight risk.”

What does penguin who does magic say to his audience?
– Pick a cod, any cod.

Why don’t you see any penguins in Britain?
-Because they’re afraid of Wales.

A horse, a dog, and a penguin walk into a bar
-Bartender: What are we even paying the bouncer for?

Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
-(Because they don’t have any pockets!)

What does a penguin eat on its birthday?
– Fish cakes!

How do penguins know when there’s something wrong?
– It smells a bit fishy.

What’s black, white and red all over?
– (A penguin with a sunburn!)

Why was the penguin so popular?
– Well, he was an ice guy!

Why do penguins never get married?
-They always get cold feet

Who is the head of the Penguin Navy?
– Admiral Byrd.

What is smarter than a talking penguin?
-A spelling bee!

American politics is like a penguin.
-It has both a left wing and a right wing. But are only good for flapping and making noises.

What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
-(Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow!)

Why would a penguin cross the road twice?
-To prove he isn’t a chicken.

What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
– Iceberg lettuce.

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