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Funny jokes in 2025

What did the cow say to the turtle?
-Get a mooove on.

Why did the turtle go to AT&T
– because he couldn’t sprint

How does a tree use a computer?
– It logs on

Why did Titanic leave its date?
– He couldn’t brake the ice

How do you fix a broken gorilla?
-With a monkey wrench

I went into the local library and asked if they had any books on the Titanic. “Oh yes, quite a few.” the librarian said.
– “Sorry to hear that!” I said laughing. “They’ll all be ruined by now!”

I was in a computer room in college today…
– A black person asked where the coloured printer was. I said, “it’s 2016 you can use any printer.”

Roses are red,Violets are blue,
– I can’t rhyme,Banana.

What is a European dragon’s favorite food?
-Swiss charred.

A guy parks his bicycle outside the US capitol…
security comes to him and says “you can’t park your bike here. Don’t you know that Congressmen, Senators, Speaker, Vice President, foreign dignitaries, and the President come here often?”
– the guy says “oh don’t worry, I’ve chained my bike!”

What’s it called when all the treats are gone?
– A cat-astrophe.

What did the artist draw before he went to bed?
-The curtains!

What is an artist’s favorite swimming technique?
-The brushstroke.

What are the odds of a Mexican getting across the border?
– Juan in a million.

What does an alien do when he has to get in touch with Saturn?
– He gives Saturn a ring.

Why was Cinderella so very bad at soccer?
-Because she was always running away from the ball, kept losing her shoes, and she had a pumpkin for a coach!

What’s a furry’s favorite line from Bohemian Rhapsody?
– Mamaaaaa, OwO

One time I had a donut stuffed with icing
-It was filling!

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