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Funny jokes in 2025

What is a koala’s favorite car?
– A furrari.

Roses are red,Violets are blue,
-Sorry to say,I’m not into you.

Only you can read my mind when the comms are sabotaged.

Ole and Sven are standing at the base of a flagpole in West Salem, looking up.
A woman walks by and asks what they were doing.
“Ve are supposed to find da height of da flagpole,” says Sven, “but ve don’t haf da ladder.”
The woman takes a wrench from her purse, loosens a few bolts, and lays the pole down. Then she takes a tape measure
from her pocketbook, takes a measurement, announces, “Eighteen feet, six inches”, and walks away.
Ole shakes his head and laughes. “Ain’t dat just like a voman! Ve ask for da height and she gives us da length!”

To the kids of ‘Karen’s’, yo mama so fat
– She bounced back from hell.

So I read on a website to “treat your furry friend once a week.”
– So I bought him two tickets to Zootopia.

If you were a basketball, I’d never shoot.
-Because I’d always miss you.

Dad, can you put my shoes on?
-No, I don’t think they’ll fit me.

Did you hear about the circus fire?
-It was in tents.

Why do soccer players do so well in school?
-They know how to use their heads.

Where do you shear a sheep?
-At the baa baa shop

What’s the square root of Minecraft?
– There’s three, actually. The potatoes, the carrots, and the beetroots.

Ole, Lena, and Sven were lost in the North woods and were becoming desperate, having run out of food several days ago. It
was winter, the snow was deep, their situation was looking very bleak. When Ole dug down into the snow to look for
something to eat, he found an old lamp and upon rubbing it to get the snow off, a genie came out.
The genie says, “I am the great genie of the North and I can grant each of you one wish.
Ole says, “I vish I vas back on my farm.” Poof, Ole was gone.
Lena quickly says, “I vish I vas back on da farm wit Ole.” Poof, Lena was gone.
Sven was sitting there looking sad and the genie finally says, “What is your wish?”.
Sven says, “Gee, I’m really lonely. I vish Ole and Lena vas back here with me”.

What’s a Hawaiian squirrel’s favorite anime?
– My Hero Macadamia (Nut).

What do you call a furry that likes to be on the bottom in bed?
– A subwoofer

What do you call an alligator with compass?
– A Navi-gator.

My uncle drank a whole bottle of wood varnish
– He had a horrible death but a lovely finish

Why are the new GM trucks more aerodynamic?
– So they will save the Fords gas when the Ford tows them away.

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