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Ole and Lena jokes in 2025

Ole tells Sven that somebody stole his credit card a few months ago.
Sven asks, “Dat’s terrible Ole. Did you report da card stolen?”
“Heck no!” says Ole. “He spends less than Lena!”

Ole decided to get a tattoo and had some words tattoed on his back. A few hours later the tattoo artist gets a call from an
angry Ole. “Ya bum, you did my tattoo backvard!”
The tattoo arist is confused, “It’s backward?”
Ole continues, “Ya I’m looking at it in da mirror right now!”
Sven was filling out an application when he appeared stuck. “Ole,” asked Sven, “What should I put for length of residence?”
“Oh,” said Ole, “I tink yours is about forty feet.”

Ole walks into work, and both of his ears are all bandaged up. The boss says, “What happened to your ears?”
Ole says, “Yesterday I vas ironing a shirt ven da phone rang and I accidentally answered da iron.”
The boss says, “Well, that explains one ear, but what happened to your other ear?”
Ole says, “I tried ta call da doctor.”

One day Ole gets a plan to make some money so he goes to one of the rich neighborhoods. Ole rings the door bell and says,
“Hello, is der anyting I could do for you ta make some money?”
The man thinks and says, “Sure, can paint my porch. You will find all the stuff in the garage.”
Ole says, “O.K., How much vill ya pay me?”
The man says, “How much does fifty bucks sound?”
Ole quickly agrees and get straight to work. The wife who had heard the conversation inside says, “50 bucks, I hope he
knows the porch goes all around the house!”
Two hours later Ole knocks on the door and says, “O.K. I am done. Can I have da money now?”
Surprised the man replies, “OK, let me get the money”
He comes back and Ole says as he is leaving, “By da vay, Dat’s a Ferrari, not a Porch-e!”

Ole tells Sven that somebody stole his credit card a few months ago.
Sven asks, “Dat’s terrible Ole. Did you report da card stolen?”
“Heck no!” says Ole. “He spends less than Lena!

Ole asks Sven one day, “Sven, vut does IDK stand for?”
Sven tells him, “I don’t know.”
Ole is digusted, “Cripes, nobody knows!”

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