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Octopus Jokes 🐙 in 2025

What is an octopus’s favorite game?
– Squidditch

Why everyone at the school is afraid of the octopus?
– He is armed

What’s a baby octopus’s favorite story?…
– Octo-puss in boots!

It’s a good thing that squidward doesn’t have two more tentacles…
– Because then it would be octward.

What sea creatures say hello sixteen times?
– Two octopuses shaking hands!

How did the octopuses win the football match?
– Ten tackles

What did the squid sheriff put together to find the outlaw cowboy?…
– An octoposse.

What type of keyboard does an octopus prefer to use?…
– Sqwerty!

What does an octopus tell its girlfriend?
– You octopi my heart!

Why is the octopus always on time?
– Because he looks at the clock-topus!

People sometimes confuse the plural of octopus, it’s one octopus, two octopuses, 3.14 octopi.

What sea creatures say hello sixteen times?…
– Two octopuses shaking hands.

Why is the octopus the most popular animal?…
– Because it’s tenta-cool!How do you know if a squid has swallowed a clock?…
– You hear a tick tock-topus sound!

How does an octopus propose to its sweetheart?
– “I would like to ask for your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage.”

A recruiter asks an octopus if he wants to join the Army.
– The octopus says no thanks I’m army enough as it is.

What do you get if you cross a cat with an octopus?
– Arrested under the Animal Scientific Procedures Act 1986.

What game do octopuses play at Hogwarts?
– Squiddich

What do you call a Mexican crossed with an octopus?
– I don’t know, but it sure can pick lettuce.

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