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Nurse Jokes 👩‍⚕️ in 2025

What’s It Called When A Hospital Runs Out Of Maternity Nurses?
-A mid-wife crisis!

What were the three nurses saying about the invisible patient?
– We should tell him that the doctor can’t see him right now.

How does Thor’s nurse treat him back to health?
-She Norses him through the night.

Nurse to doctor, “There’s a man in the waiting room who thinks he is invisible.”
-Doctor, “Tell him I can’t see him.”

What did the witch say to the nurse?
-I have an appointment with the doctor; I had a dizzy spell.

What is artery?
-dy of classical paintings.

Did you hear about the nurse who died and went straight to hell?
-It took her two weeks to realize that she wasn’t at work anymore!

What did the mattress say to the nurse?
-I think I have spring fever.

Why do nurses bring red magic markers into work?
-In case they have to draw blood.

What did the forgetful nurse say?
-I have a joke on amnesia, but I forget how it goes.

Why was the nurse feeling mad?
-He ran out of patients.

How do night nurses feel when they think about their early days at the hospital and want to go back?
-They feel nursetalgic.

What do you call two ITU nurses holding hands?
-A synapse.

A ghost asked, “Nurse, can you tell me what does the X-ray of my head show?
-“Absolutely nothing!” she replied.

The teacher asked the nurse what is bacteria?
-One of them replied, “Is it a back door to the cafeteria?”

When is the worst time to have a heart attack?
– During a game of charades!

What did the balloon say to the nurse during the routine checks up?
– I am feeling light-headed.

What did the patient say when the nurse informed them that they would be administering an enema?
-But is it friendly?

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