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Mustache Jokes in 2025

My wife said my mustache brought out my personality.
-I replied, “Yeah, it’s growing on me”
(Thought of this one right before sleep, I’ll check on it in the morning)

If you have a beard and wear robes, you’re a Wizard. If you have a goatee and wear robes, you’re a Sorcerer…
-…and if you have a mustache and wear robes, you’re not allowed near public schools.

I moustache you a question…
-can you count the puns?

What’s worse than a man having a small mustache that he doesn’t take care of?
-A man not having any mustache at all.

Why do Italian boys always have mustaches?
-Because they want to be just like there mothers when they grow up.

Why was the man with no facial hair in pain after shaving?
-His must-ached.

I shaved my mustache after having kept it for a few years
-I hated the way I looked at first, but it’s growing on me.

I didn’t like my mustache so I decided to shave it
-Changed my mind last minute though because it had really grown on me

What would you call a mustache growing on someone’s cheek?
-A miss-tache!

what do you call a person obsessed with japanese gaming consoles?
-A Wiib.
Don’t touch my mustache.

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