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Mustache Jokes in 2025

How come people with mustaches lose them so often?
-They’re hiding right under their noses.

Which snack has a great mustache?
-A pi-stach-io.

I spent years searching for the perfect mustache
-It was right under my nose the whole time.

What did the man tell his teenage son when he was getting late for school?
-It looks like you should shave it for later.

What type of facial hair often has to leave in a hurry?
-A moustache.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Mustache.
– Mustache who?
I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.

NSFW – a friend of mine told me he’s getting it on with his girlfriend and her twin. I asked how he can tell them apart… it’s easy he said
-Her brother has a mustache.

What did the teenage guy say when he was eagerly waiting for his mustache and beard to grow?
– I wish you were hair.

An Eskimo goes to the mechanic
-the mechanic says “It looks like you blew a seal.” and the Eskimo says “No, that’s just frost on my mustache.”

There’s a knock at the door
The butler goes and answers the door.
-“Sir, there’s a man at the door with a mustache.”
“I’m not interested, tell him I’ve already got one!”

Movember’s here.
-It’s mustache season all over again.

How do you tell the difference between a man with a mustache and a man without a mustache?
– The man with a mustache is the attractive one.

I never liked the idea of having a mustache..
-But then it grew on me.

Why did the man shave his mustache before participating in a dangerous stunt?
-He said better shave than sorry.

You compliment someone for their mustache and suddenly
-She’s not your friend anymore.

I mustache you a question.
-Have you seen my blue marker?

I am liking my mustache more and more every day
-its really growing on me

What did the mustache father ask his son?
-I hope you are be-shaving yourself.

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