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Monkey Jokes 🐵 in 2025

What do you call a man who can jump from tree to tree?
-A monkey’s uncle.

Why did King Kong climb the Empire State building?
-Because he couldn’t fit in the lift.

What do you call a monkey at the south pole?
-Lost!

Two monkeys are in the bath.
-One turns to the other and says, “Oooo ooo aah aahh!”
The second monkey says, “Well, put some cold in then!”

Where do baby monkeys sleep?
-In ape-ri-cots.

hy don’t monkeys wear pocket watches?
-Because they don’t wear pants.

What’s a monkey’s favourite TV show?
-Thomas the Orangu-Tank Engine!

Why did the monkey put a net over its head?
-It wanted to catch its breath.

What do you call monkeys that share an amazon account?
-Prime mates.

What did the banana say to the monkey?
-Nothing, bananas don’t talk.

What do you call a crowd of monkeys?
-An Orangatangle.

Why shouldn’t you get into a fight with a monkey?
-They use gorilla warfare.

What do monkeys do for laughs?
-They tell jokes about people.

What do monkeys get when they sunbathe?
-An orangu-tan.

Where do monkeys go to grab a beer?
-The monkey bars!

I told my daughter, “Did you know that humans eat more bananas than monkeys?”
-She rolled her eyes at me, but I persevered. “It’s true!”
“When was the last time you ate a monkey?!”

Today I learnt that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
-I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey!

What’s a monkey’s favourite teacher at Hogwarts?
-Professor Sn-ape.

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