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Milk jokes 🥛🍼 in 2025

Did you see the news about the person they found dead in a bathtub full of milk with banana slices in the milk?
– They think it was a cereal killer.

What did the puma say when he realized his pa has been gone to get the milk and hasn’t returned for hours?
– “Um…”

Why can’t Swiss cheese be part of a fat-free diet?
– It’s made with hole milk.

What type of milk can one get from a cow who is a dwarf?
– Condensed milk.

What do you say to a person with milk on their lip?
– Great mooostache!

So a man walks into a coffee house late in the afternoon and asks for a tall drink with 4 shots of espresso and the rest filled with milk.
The barista looks at him lightly concerned and she says,
Are you sure sir? That’s a latte coffee.

How do you know which cow is the best dancer?
– See which one has the best moo-ves.

Why do cows wear bells around their necks?
– Because their horn do not work.

I tried raising cows, but they didn’t produce any milk.
– Needless to say, my venture was an udder failure.

I tried to collect some wool and milk from my farm and the animals went crazy.
– It was shear and udder panic.

Why do cannibals prefer to eat pregnant women?
– Because of the kinder surprise and the extra portion milk.

What kind of shows do cows like best?
– Moosicals.

What does milking a cow smell like?
– Dairy Air

Leading entomologists experimenting with ant larvae have reported that while the introduction of milk-born disaccharides increased their height by 31%, it also inhibited tarsus growth by 47%.
– The study concluded that the resulting specimens lack toes in taller ants

What is the toughest thing about becoming a vegan?
– Having to milk the almonds.

What do you call a cow that can’t make milk?
– A milk dud.

I want to open a milk factory and name the company “Legend”.
– It’ll be “Legend-Dairy

How do you get milk and eggs if all you have is chickens?
– You get the eggs from the first chicken. Then you get the milk from the udder chicken.

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