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Mechanic jokes 👨‍🔧 in 2025

Why are KKK members terrible mechanics?
– They never check under the hood.

Why was the dog left in the garage?
– Because it was a barking garage!

Heard about the dinosaur who got into a car accident?
– It was a Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.

A man goes to the mechanic.
– He says “My car goes rr- rr-rr-”
– The mechanic says “Yes, the transmission probably needs replacing.”
– The man frowns and says “My car goes rr-rr-rr-”
– The mechanic says “Yes, the transmission probably needs replacing.”
– The man looks angry and says “Would you l-let me ff-finish! I have a ss-stutter. My car goes rr-rr-rr-really slowly uphill!”
– The mechanic says “Yes, the transmission probably needs replacing.”

If the chick from AutoZone has to help you
– It’s time for a new hobby

What happens if you place a bag in a garage?
– It turns into garbage.

Heard about the diet-conscious guy who took his car for repair?
– He asked the mechanic to remove the carb-orator.

Mechanic: “When were your tires last rotated?”
– Me: “On the way here, silly.”

Want to be an aircraft mechanic
– And ended up as a tango

The mechanic was not dressed fashionably at the event, so he went to change his a-tire.

Why was the car so costly to repair?
– Because it got inflated.

Heard about the snake mechanic who bought a new car?
– It was a brand new ana-Honda.

Why can’t the mechanic find a good screw?
– Because every time he nuts, she bolts.

Mechanic vs. heart surgeon … similar jobs?
– A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.
– The surgeon was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike when the
– mechanic shouted across the garage, “Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?”
– The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle.
– The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag, and asked, “So, Doc, look at this engine.
– I open its heart, take valves out, fix ’em, put ’em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new.
– So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing
– basically the same work?”
– The surgeon paused, smiled, leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic,
– “Try doing it with the **engine running**.”

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