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Mechanic jokes 👨‍🔧 in 2025

Why were quantum car mechanics so generous?
– Because they took the minimum charge.

Why did the car stop running?
– Because the driver took the brake in the afternoon!

Why was the government not allowing the driving of electric cars?
– Because it would lead to many re-volts!

A proctologist gets sick of his medical career and decides it’s time for a change. He does a bit of research and settles on trying his hand at being a mechanic. He attends mechanic school diligently and pays attention in the hopes of being the best mechanic in town.
– After taking his final exam, he notices a mistake with the grade on the test and asks the teacher.
– “Sir, you have me 150% out of a possible 100% on the practical exam. This must be a mistake!”
– The teacher replies, “It’s no mistake. 50% of the grade is for perfect disassembly of the en…

How did the mechanic feel after he left the muffler shop?
– He was exhausted

The garage owner fired the new mechanic because he didn’t know the drill!

What happened when the mechanic was trying to reverse his old grandfather’s car?
– It was taking him back.

What do you call a queen who works as a mechanic for a physicist?
– Queentum mechanic.

Which car owner needs no bolts for his car?
– Usain Bolt.

Why was the mechanic working on the wooden car?
– It wooden go.

I was talking to my wife about permanent mechanical fasteners
– She was riveted

Heard about Sundar Pichai’s new car?
– No one saw it; it was all chromed out!

In order to get to the valves, a mechanic carefully removed the engine parts from a car while the car owner – a surgeon – looked on.
– Afterwards the mechanic said to the surgeon:
– You know, I reckon my line of work is every bit as difficult and skilled as yours.’
– Perhaps,’ said the surgeon, ‘But I’d like to see you do it while the engine is running.’

I asked my mechanic why he was dressed as a female fox.
– He said he was just vixen my car

What did the cat say to the mechanic?
– I think I need a new cat-alytic converter for my car.

What did the mechanic say when his mother said that good things happen to good people?
– The mechanic said, “Look at my kar-ma.”

What does the mechanic say after he’s fixed your car’s horn?
– Beep repaired.

Warning
– I’m the car mechanic your mother warned you about

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