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Mattress jokes ๐Ÿ› in 2025

What do you call a nervous mattress? All wound up!

What’s a mattress’s favorite animal? A bedbug!

Why did the mattress go to school? To get more than a rest-education!

Why was the mattress a bad pilot? It always fell asleep at the wheel!

Why are mattresses terrible tennis players? They serve up nothing but softballs!

Why was the mattress a terrible musician? It couldn’t hold a note!

Why did the mattress go to therapy? It had too many pressure points!

Why did the mattress refuse to join the orchestra? It was afraid of the strings attached!

Why don’t mattresses have good memory? They always get flipped over!

What’s a mattress’s favorite type of tree? The pine, they’re made of it!

Why was the mattress a bad driver? It was always hitting the snooze!

What’s a mattress’s favorite type of exercise? The bed lift!

Why was the mattress a bad roommate? It was always sleeping!

Why did the mattress start a blog? It had many sleep stories to share!

What’s a mattress’s favorite dance? The Twist and Shout!

Why was the mattress a terrible tour guide? It always led people to the bed!

Why don’t mattresses like going to parties? They’re not into springing into action!

Why was the mattress a bad actor? It always slept through its lines!

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