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Marriage jokes ๐Ÿคต๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ‘ฐ in 2025

The groom is the kind of guy you donโ€™t have to worry about introducing your parents to.
Thatโ€™s why (Bride) didnโ€™t worry about introducing (Groom) to hers until today.

The Groom has informed me that the buffet this evening is charged on a cost-per-head basis.
– So, on his behalf, Iโ€™d like to thank the following people for not comingโ€ฆ

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.

Theyโ€™ve been together for so many years, instead of the Wedding March the organist should have played the Hallelujah Chorus.

Grooms, once you get married remember that when you have a discussion with your future wife, always get the last two words in
: โ€œYes, dear.โ€

At every party there are two kinds of people: those who want to go home and those who donโ€™t.
The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.

Iโ€™ve fallen in love with a pencil and weโ€™re getting married.
I canโ€™t wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.

What makes a good wife?
One who helps her husband with the washing up! And, Whatโ€™s the last thing youโ€™ll say to you wife before going to sleep?
It doesnโ€™t matter what I say, youโ€™ll buy it anyway.

I havenโ€™t spoken to my mother-in-law for eighteen monthsโ€ฆ. I donโ€™t like to interrupt her.

Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments of silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 200 chickens, countless carnations, delphiniums, lilies and roses who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible.

Do you know why the king of hearts married the Queen of hearts?
– They were perfectly suited for each other.

Iโ€™d also like to congratulate the groom on a truly magnificent speech, I always knew it would be hard to follow, and I was right, I could hardly follow a word of it.

Taking my husbandโ€™s last name doesnโ€™t mean Iโ€™m not a feminist; it means I donโ€™t want anyone I went to high school with to be able to find me ever again.

He has been in love with the same woman for 25 yearsโ€”I hope his wife doesnโ€™t find out.

The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship are โ€œI apologizeโ€ and โ€œYou are right.โ€

Outvoted 1-1 by my wife again.

Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?
Wife: Yes and no.

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