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Lobster jokes 🦞 in 2025

Have you heard about the lobster that rode a sea mammal into battle?
– He did it on Porpoise.

What do lobsters order when they go to a coffee shop?
– A cup of crab-uccino!

Have you heard that there was a big fight between the blue lobsters and the red lobsters?
– The other lobsters were saying it was like a sea-n was from a movie.

Why did the lobster eat his meal at such an early time?
– Because the food at the restaurant was served based on a first-come, first surfed basis.

Where are there no hipster lobsters?
– In the Maine stream.

Why was Sean Connery giving away his lobster costume?
– He was trying to be a little less shellfish.

Have you found your lost lobster yet?… No, it’s just a lost claws now.

What does every lobster like to drink in the morning?
– Clawfee.

I ate at Mary Poppins’ Restaurant last night…
– Super cauliflower cheese, but the lobster was atrocious.

Why won’t a pair of lobsters share their best jokes with each other?
– Because they are two shellfish

Where do lobsters keep their books?
– On a book-shell.

Why were the lobsters out celebrating?…
– Probably because it was the festive sea-son.

What did the chef say when a customer asked him why her lobster tasted different to the other freshwater crustaceans?
– He said, “Because the ocean made it salty.”

How did the lobsters travel around the beach?
– By shell-i-copter.

Who brings presents to lobsters?
– Santa Claws

What do lobsters eat for lunch?
– Fish and ships.

Did you have the lobster bisque tonight for the first time?
– Yes, and it was souper good.

Did you hear about the lobster that did not know he won an award at the school festival?
– He did, but he just didn’t realize his tidal.

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