Little Johnny jokes in 2025

Teacher: “Name two pronouns?”
– Little Johnny: “Who? Me?”

Little Johnny’s Homework
Teacher: Johnny, where is your homework?
– Johnny: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren’t the best teacher in school.

Teacher: “If 1+ 1 = 2 and 2+ 2 = 4, what is 4+ 4?”
– Little Johnny: “That’s not fair you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!”

Johnny: “Dad, have you ever been to Egypt?”
– Dad: “No son, why do you ask?”
– Johnny: “Well where did you find our mummy?”

Little Johnny was getting beaten up by two kids so I came and hellped
– He won’t stand against the three of us!

Teacher: “Great news, we have a test today, come rain or shine.”
– Little Johnny smiles.
– Teacher: “So what’s so funny about it?”
– Little Johnny: “It’s snowing!”

Davy: “Johnny, aren’t you coming out to play today?”
– Johnny: “No, I have to stay in and help my father with my homework.”

Little Johnny wrote: “Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother!”
– Santa wrote back: “Send me your mother.”

Little Johnny says to his Dad: ”Dad, will you do my math for me?”
– His Dad replies: ”No, son, it wouldn’t be right.”
– Little Johnny responds: ”Well, you could try…”

Teacher: “Can you tell me something important that didn’t exist 100 years ago?”
– Little Johnny: “Me!”

Little Johnny, can you tell me what “Monumental” means?
– “It means acting crazy,” says little Johnny.
– “Where did you hear that?” the teacher asks.
– “From the Jamaican guy next door.

Johnny, where’s your homework?” Miss Martin said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand.
– “My dog ate it,” was his solemn response.
– “Johnny, I’ve been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?”
– “It’s true, Miss Martin, I swear,” insisted Johnny. “I had to force him, but he ate it!”

Little Johnny’s father farted. The son asked his father: “What was that?”
– His father said: “My sweet that is ‘north wind’”
– When he went to school the teacher asked the class: “Who knows the direction of the north wind? Little Johnny shouted: “My daddy’s ass!”

Teacher: “I told you to stand at the end of the line?”
– Little Johnny: “I tried, but there was someone already there!”

Did you know Johnny Cash and Eddie Money were really good friends?
– They both had common cents.

A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”
– Little Johnny replied, “Because people are sleeping.”

Little Johnny asks the teacher, “Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I haven’t done?”
– Mrs Roberts is shocked, “Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!” Little Johnny is relieved, “OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I haven’t done my homework.”

During the concert little Johnny sits in the front row waiting for the concert to begin.
– A friend asks “Johnny, how did you manage to get a ticket to the concert?”
– Johnny replies “I got a ticket from my sister.”
– The friend asks “and where is your sister?”
– Johnny says “Back at home, looking for her ticket.”