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Lion jokes 🦁 in 2025

Why did the lion lose at poker?
– He was playing with a cheetah!

Why do lions always eat raw meat?
– They don’t know how to cook, silly.

Who is the lion’s favorite football player?
– Lionel Messi.

How does the big cat like his steak?
– Raw.

What did the vegetarian lion say before going hunting?
– “Lettuce prey”

Where does a lion sleep?
– Anywhere it wants to! Are you gonna stop it?!

Why did the circus lion eat the tightrope walker?
– He wanted a well-balanced meal.

Why did the lion trainer accessorize his lions?
– So they could take pride in their appearance.

Why did the circus lion eat the tightrope walker?
– He wanted a well-balanced meal.

Harambe and Cecil the Lion walk into a bar
– Bartender asks, “What’ll you have?”
They respond, “Two shots, please.”

On which days do lions eat the most?
– Chewsdays.

Why don’t lions like fast food?
– Because they can’t catch it!

Why did the lion eat the lamp?
– He wanted a light lunch.

Went for dinner with the zoo animals the other day. They didn’t all bring their wallets, I ended up paying the lion’s share.

Why are desert lions so popular around Christmas time?
– They have sandy claws.

What baseball team do lions like?
– The Cubs.

For me, the urge to sing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” is always just a whim away… a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away…

What does the lion use to brush his mane?
– A catacomb.

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